Simple. Powerful. Honest. The video gives a glimpse into the impact of bullying on young minds, showing how small words can have a massive impact.
Some people stick to the old adage, “…words will never hurt me.” To a degree, I can get behind that statement, but, strong negative beliefs ARE EXTREMELY damaging. What are words besides seeds that grow into beliefs. Bullying introduces those seeds and creates an environment that perfectly cultivates words into core beliefs.
I frequently remind people that our thoughts are only as powerful as the extent to which we believe them. If I 100% believe that I will die in a plane crash when I fly, that thought will have an intense impact on my emotions and, potentially, my behavior. If I can have the thought “I could die during this flight,” and give it a statistically appropriate amount of believability (.000000009%), that thought is just a thought and has virtually no impact.
How does this connect with bullying?
In order to strengthen beliefs, we typically revisit the thoughts related to that belief – either by connecting with a community that supports those beliefs (i.e. church, sporting events, etc) and/or by rehearsing the statements in our own heads (i.e. internally repeating, “It’s gonna be fine.” during a crisis). In doing so, we confirm the “truth” behind the statement, increasing the believability and amplifying the impact the thoughts have. It’s a strategy that is helpful in many scenarios as we work to strengthen the thoughts and beliefs that support a rich and engaging life. This same technique is dangerous when the thoughts and beliefs are self-depreciating, judgmental, violent or otherwise harmful. Bullying mirrors these strategies, bombarding victims with persistent and overwhelming reminders of hurtful beliefs.
“You’re an idiot!” is just words. “I’m an idiot” is just a thought. If those statements are reintroduced day after day, week after week, month after month, they’re likely to become beliefs. If an ever expanding social circle reinforces those ideas, it becomes harder to NOT believe it. When it’s the voice in your own head, it becomes almost impossible to escape.
When those hurtful and unhelpful seeds get planted, do your best to respond with “THEY WERE WRONG!”
We never know what is going through the minds of children. The pain and suffering often times becomes more that they can handle. Thank you for sharing this video.